“When is it okay to turn your back on your family?” Being related to someone doesn’t mean we have to be enslaved to that person, specially when you are asked to perform ungodly duties.
I was asked to make sense of abuse and misuse earlier this week and found myself immersed in familiar territory when ministering to a friend in need. In tears, Merina shared her family and friends were putting enormous pressure on her and contributing to much sorrow in her life.
A product of child abuse myself, I had almost forgotten what it’s like to be surrounded by ungodly family members and tempted into sin on a daily basis. It’s much easier to give in to temptation when everyone around us is weak!
Making no excuse for our own weaknesses, I believe someone can still be held accountable for mistakes made while serving family members. Just because they are your brother, sister or even a parent, this doesn’t mean they have the right to take advantage of their bloodline. There can be such a thing as abuse and misuse of one’s kindness and generosity.
When a family member turns into our enemy, when we are called to turn our backs on God, this is when we must choose His bloodline over our own.
The bible reads “But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust. For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? Do not even the publicans the same? And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? Do not even the publicans so? Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.” (Matthew 5:44-48)
Merina explained her family and friends are otherwise nice people that go to church and on the surface at least, seem to live righteous lives. The fact Merina’s family are church goers is one thing however, there is more to living the Christian life than going to church. “Don’t be fooled” I told her. Don’t be fooled by a relative’s habit instead add up the sum of each person’s actions as we are all called to “walk the walk”.
True believers do not treat family members with disrespect or go around abusing their hearts. While we are expected to forgive others, we are also called to separate ourselves from those who do not live according to the Lord’s commands. Leaving a destructive environment could very well mean cutting ties with family members! But it is important to let them know why we choose to distance ourselves from them and be ready to answer difficult questions.
Also, be ready to rejoice with family members who live in God’s light, be ready to love those who do walk with Christ.
“Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy; it is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily. It is not conceited–arrogant and inflated with pride; it is not rude (unmannerly), and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking ; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it–pays no attention to a suffered wrong. It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness , but rejoices when right and truth prevail. Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best about every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances and it endures everything (without weakening). Love never fails–never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)
The bottom line is it is never okay to turn your back on your family though it may be necessary. Let’s remember to keep witnessing to all those around us in spite of their actions for it is through us that God performs miracles.
We thank you for all that surrounds us and for your love.
We ask that you will inspire us to Pray in your name
And give us patience to wait for Answers
Or guide us to look for Answers in your Word the Bible.
Lord we thank you for inviting us to be part of your family
And for sending your son Jesus to live and die for us
So that we learn from him guiding our lives after his.
God we pray you will give us strength in difficult times
And bless us with your light on cloud covered days
Inspiring us to seek you and rejoice with you in prayer.
Please Lord forgive our sins as only you can
And lay before us your path for our lives
So that we may follow in your footsteps each and every day.
Thank you all mighty God for all that you make possible
Today and forever!
This message was written by Daniel St.Pierre